Life’s lessons sometimes come as silent as a night sky and at other times as direct as a punch in the gut that sets me writhing on the ground. Yesterday was an experience of a hillside that spoke to me clearly as I was bending down to collect a slender woodland star flower for a friend.
A group of us women gathered last evening for a light potluck and to come into Circle for laughter and song. We arrived at the home of our hostess around 4 pm, greeting one another in tender embraces and welcoming smiles. I had watched for emerging wildflowers and other early Spring medicinal plants to forage on the drive over. I was excited to see the first buds of the mountain ash emerging, of waterleaf (Phacelia sp.), and clusters of woodland stars.
Upon arrival at our gathering place, I embarked upon a small walk to see what plants were growing in the landscape surrounding the house. I bent forward to pick a single woodland star at the base of a steep hill, when I distinctly felt the word “Climb!” in my Heart.
I know of intuition, and I really try to answer its directives when I receive them. Especially the strong ones, and this call was strong….I looked up the hill, noticing the steep 45 degree angle all the way to the top where a cap of volcanic boulders stood. I sized up my condition quickly. No water, shoes without socks, and a bad back condition that commonly limits my ability to walk…even on flat ground.
I have had my share of decades of severe pain, neurological nerve problems and uncontrollable spasms in my lower body. My physician calls my condition “post laminectomy syndrome” or “failed back syndrome” where a back surgery undertaken in 2010 has failed, creating worse cascading symptoms and conditions in my spine than what I had before the surgery. Two herniated disks, four additional collapsed flat as pancakes. Severe pinching of the spinal column to the thickness of a diaper pin, cascading scoliosis and arthritic changes. My low back teeters at a 40 degree angle…. NOT exactly a physical condition to allow for scrambling up a steep hillside into rocky outcrops.I did not flinch though, after such an Internal urging.
I am seeking “Healing” for my body in ways not recognized by western medicine. I have already endured one failed surgery, my body does not like them. Which makes me a poor candidate for yet another….. I am being forced to listen to my body, to trust in my higher self and intuition. I need to open to the possibility that healing can and will come from another direction. I need to believe in where Gaea leads me, trust that there are deeper meanings and energy exchanges, frequencies, in which to engage for my healing …. both physically and spiritually.
I leaned into the hillside step by step, sometimes falling to my knees to crawl another few feet uphill. I did not question what I was doing. About two-thirds up the hillside, I heard a shout below from a friend who said “Wait for me! I’m coming to help you!”. Dee appeared below me scrambling hard to catch up. When she arrived where I was resting, she looked me in the eye and said that she was there to help me complete what I had to do safely. Together we climbed, at times slipping a bit from the steepness of the slope. She became and extra arm, strong in support to pull me up when I faltered….
We entered the reef of boulders attentively. We knew the native peoples used this place. Although pine trees dominated the forested stands, I could see that oak woodlands use to exist there…long before white man set foot in the local region. Oak woodlands feed many Beings….humans, deer, elk, coyote, badger, squirrels and chipmunk, woodpeckers of all kinds from the mighty mast of acorns they produce. We spoke words of honor, gratitude, and respect to the rock reefs and trees. We Sang without words to the Spirits of this Place. We gathered a few red-tinged acorns, already sprouted in the soil, to plant at home. We visited boulders where women from many generations ground acorns and celebrated in ceremony for whatever their intentions.
Dee and I took a break to rest, back-to-back to support each other on a large boulder. When we rose from our rest, she excitedly pointed out a creature that was basking with us in the late afternoon sun. All I saw was a slender streak of a bright iridescent blue tail as it disappeared into some rocks and leaves. I was dumbfounded. I have never seen such a creature….not ever. What had Mother sent me to See or Experience on this sojourn? Why had I been urged to “Climb!”?
I think it was to receive the Medicine of both doing something against my own perceived limitations and this small creature….It turns out that we saw a Blue-tailed western skink (Plestiodon skiltonianus). I have learned that the gift of this little creature is to teach me to listen carefully to my own wisdom and guidance. To be still in order to observe my surroundings and to understand dreams….that Change is coming to my life, to remember to be adaptable. To “create my own reality, to grow into whatever I need to be.”…. The skink also symbolizes Power that is yet untapped….. That I have amazing potential & power, more than I can ever know.
The color Blue relates directly to my birth time in the Mayan Calendar. I was born under the auspices of the “electric blue night”. The dark night brings intuition and dreams. In dreams there is no shortage, there is abundance. Everything is perfect. The night dares to challenge to let go of the idea of shortage. Have courage! The night also signifies the dark inside of the temple of Self. Dare to go inside. In the dark, depend on other sensory systems and the information sources. Be surprised! Gifts wait for me in my inner temple. Become one with the stillness and intuition found there.Blue symbolizes vitality and strength which comes from calm and confidence. Soothing coolness brings with it great healing and renewal. It instills a sense of tranquility and grounded confidence, while giving rise to the ability to communicate needs and verbalize intuitive impressions….. so much information! Much to muse about….,.